Let's Play: Parent Participation in Play

With busy schedules and countless responsibilities, it can be difficult for parents to find time to actively play with their children, especially without distractions. While it may feel challenging, choosing to play rather than observe can offer many meaningful benefits for your child. Parents have a unique opportunity to slow down interactions and create a safe, supportive space where children can practice skills that may feel difficult in everyday situations. For example, if a child is working on sharing, parents can intentionally create moments to model and practice this skill in a low-pressure environment. If a child struggles with playing in different ways or expanding ideas, parents can help demonstrate new approaches in a fun and engaging way. These shared moments help build confidence and skills while strengthening the parent-child connection.

How to get started

As I mentioned, finding time to truly play and connect with your child without distractions can be difficult. Look at your schedule and responsibilities and decide what feels manageable for you. For some parents, this might be an hour a day; for others, it may be just five minutes. That is okay. What matters most is doing what works best for you and your family.

Once you have a time planned out, try to keep it consistent. Children thrive on routine, and knowing when special playtime will happen can help them feel secure and excited. During this time, make it a priority to play without electronics present or in the background. Leave phones in another room or on silent, and turn off televisions, tablets, and music. Focus on being fully present and connecting with your child.

Time to play!

When playing with your child focus on following your child's lead and joining in activities they are interested in. This doesn’t mean they have full control over everything, but it does mean their interests are being valued.  If you’re comfortable, try to be an active participant—play chase, build with LEGOs, or engage in pretend play. If this is outside of your comfort zone you can still be actively present by narrating what you see. For example, if your child is painting, you might make comments about what colors they are using or what they are creating.

During play try to not to focus on a specific goal or outcome. Instead, focus on enjoying the process of creating, exploring, and spending time together. You may be surprised what skills can be supported simply though play. For example, rather than having painting materials already set up, invite your child to help gather and prepare the activity. This naturally allows your child child to work on growing independence, problem solving, sequencing, and collaboration-all while having fun together.

tips to support engagement

It can be difficult to keep your child engaged during play. Try incorporating some of the strategies below to keep them enagaged and curious:

• Build anticipation: Play around with timing and suspense. Add pauses when singing a song or before starting an activity. Allow opportunities to wait and see and build curiousty.

• Model play: Show your child different ways to play with toys and materials. Try not to force them to play your way. Simply demonstrating a different way to play may help them expand their play naturally.

• Imitate your child: Copy what your child is doing. whether its stacking blocks, driving a car, or running. This can show them that their ideas are meaningful and worth paying attention to.

• Narrate and comment: Make simple comments about what you see your child doing rather than directing them. For example, “You’re using a lot of blue paint,” or “That tower is getting taller.”

• Limit questions: If you already know the answer, try to avoid asking the question. Too many questions can impact the flow of play and reduce a child's engagement.